# Eddie Griffin - Intoxicated, Masturbating, Porn, Crash



## The_Franchise (Mar 30, 2003)

> _(CBS)_ _MINNEAPOLIS_ A lawsuit was filed Thursday against Minnesota Timberwolves forward Eddie Griffin and the Minneapolis Police Department in connection with an accident involving Griffin in late March.
> 
> Interim Police Chief Tim Dolan ordered an internal investigation of the incident after the WCCO-TV I-TEAM contacted him last week about the crash, reports WCCO-TV's Caroline Lowe.
> 
> ...


http://wfrv.com/watercooler/watercooler_story_180174619.html

And no, this is not a Seinfield ripoff.


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## Hibachi! (Sep 18, 2003)

Buahahahaha


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## Hibachi! (Sep 18, 2003)

> Witnesses said the two officers who handled the incident did not test Griffin for alcohol. Instead, they gave him tickets for driving without a license and inattentive driving and also drove him to his home in St. Paul.


Wtf?


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## ATLien (Jun 18, 2002)

Hahahaha, why would he tell someone that.


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## Hibachi! (Sep 18, 2003)

TheATLien said:


> Hahahaha, why would he tell someone that.


I can't possibly imagine how that would come up... He HAD to be drunk. But the officers didn't test him for alchohol? Weak...


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## The_Franchise (Mar 30, 2003)

Maybe if he rested his arms a little more his shot would have some arc on it.


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## AMΣRICAN GOD™ (Jun 4, 2005)

PistonChamps2K4: http://basketballboards.net/forum/showthread.php?p=3740742#post3740742&conly=
PistonChamps2K4: omg
TA11en42: omgz
TA11en42: omgz lolz lawz
PistonChamps2K4: Eddie Grffin is my hero
TA11en42: he's my hero
TA11en42: you beat me to it!


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## o.iatlhawksfan (Mar 3, 2006)

LOL.LOL.LoL. hahahahahaha, are they serious??? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


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## STUCKEY! (Aug 31, 2005)

lol


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## Tooeasy (Nov 4, 2003)

hilarious. absolutely golden.


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## DuMa (Dec 25, 2004)

well this certainly beats the juwan stealing sunglasses story :rotf:


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## rock747 (Aug 3, 2004)

Wow, that's embarassing. This will haunt him forever. haha


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## Seuss (Aug 19, 2005)

I do this all the time. Whats wrong with it? Sometimes you need to get that masturbation, porn watching off your chest. Good man Griffin!


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## GNG (Aug 17, 2002)

The guy continues to top himself. Very creative this time. Kudos.


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## Pioneer10 (Sep 30, 2004)

Didn't Houston give up Richard Jefferson for this smuck.

My God you're a pro baller hire a high class hooker if you can't find a groupie you like for the night. Hell hire the porn star you're watching to have fun with for you're own personal video.


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## moss_is_1 (Jun 14, 2004)

I'm a T-wolves fan but OMG that's hillarious.
:rofl:


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## AZNoob (Jan 21, 2006)

Well, I guess Eddie Griffin will be traded to Portland, where ALL the bad rep players go.


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## NOODLESTYLE (Jan 20, 2005)

here's a video that shows clips of the supposed incident. 

http://wcco.com/video/[email protected]

"I'll buy you any car you want....a Hummer....not a bentley." :cheers:


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## Diable (Apr 26, 2005)

There used to be a guy we did business with who had a little tv on the dash on his company van,but he always claimed he was only listening to some stupid soap opera.I thought that was retarded enough,but this would have it beat.

I really don't understand why this guy can't hire a full time driver.He hasn't been allowed to drive legally for a couple of years.The money it would take to pay someone to sleep in his guest room and runn errands and drive him around would be nothing to him...especially compared to the amount of money this sort of stupidity could end up costing him.Only so much embarassment until the team decides you aren't worth it.


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## Peja Vu (Jun 9, 2002)

Pioneer10 said:


> Didn't Houston give up Richard Jefferson for this smuck.
> 
> My God you're a pro baller hire a high class hooker if you can't find a groupie you like for the night. Hell hire the porn star you're watching to have fun with for you're own personal video.


OT: He did bang Mary Carey.


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## Diable (Apr 26, 2005)

If you had too tight a grip you might really hurt yourself on impact....I bet an airbag would really hurt your penis too.

How many punchlines does his Escalade get per gallon any way?


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## Hibachi! (Sep 18, 2003)

What a MORON. After watching that tape, those officers are ****ED.


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## Bulls rock your socks (Jun 29, 2006)

OMG thats so hilarious hahahhaha no wonder kevin garnett wants to leave minnesota look who hes playing with


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## nguyen_milan (Jun 28, 2005)

He was drunk, driving, masturbating while driving and watching porn at the same time?Wow unbelievable!
You gotta admit it, this guy is so versatile. :banana: :laugh: :jawdrop: :woot: And the police must have joined him


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## Dissonance (Jul 21, 2004)

Dr.Seuss said:


> I do this all the time. Whats wrong with it? Sometimes you need to get that masturbation, porn watching off your chest. Good man Griffin!



while driving though???? Yeah, no.


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## mediocre man (Feb 24, 2004)

AZNoob said:


> Well, I guess Eddie Griffin will be traded to Portland, where ALL the bad rep players go.



6 years ago called and wants it's joke back


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## Peja Vu (Jun 9, 2002)

mediocre man said:


> 6 years ago called and wants it's joke back


 :laugh:


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## AirJordan™ (Nov 21, 2005)

LMFAO! That's hilarious! But, the thing is, it happened on March 30th, why is it only coming out to the public now?

"I'll buy you any car you want....a Hummer?....not a Bentley." :laugh:


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## Prolific Scorer (Dec 16, 2005)

Yeah, I don't see the big deal.....I might have chose the interstate though. Watching Booty Talk and masterbating while going 95 on the Freeway, awesome.


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## duncan2k5 (Feb 27, 2005)

geez...i thought everyone drunk masturbated in their SUV.


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## italianBBlover (Mar 5, 2003)

:rotf:


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## Mr. Hobbes (Jul 1, 2005)

I loved this guy wehn he was psycho, and now I love him even more.


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## moss_is_1 (Jun 14, 2004)

Bulls rock your socks said:


> *OMG thats so hilarious hahahhaha no wonder kevin garnett wants to leave minnesota * look who hes playing with


Since when? read the papers.


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## tr_west (Dec 15, 2003)

The guy who was hit by Eddie filed a lawsuit today, so that is why it took so long for the story to get out.


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## Banjoriddim (Aug 14, 2004)

This is just wrong :laugh:


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## mediocre man (Feb 24, 2004)

tr_west said:


> The guy who was hit by Eddie filed a lawsuit today, so that is why it took so long for the story to get out.



I hope the guy was hit by the vehicle and not flying bodily fluid


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## KingOfTheHeatians (Jul 22, 2005)

[Ron Burgundy voice]What? You were watching porn, masturbating AND driving all while you were drunk? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing.[/Ron Burgundy voice]


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## Unique (Apr 13, 2005)

Mr. Predictable said:


> Maybe if he rested his arms a little more his shot would have some arc on it.


:rofl:


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## StackAttack (Mar 15, 2006)

Wow. I'm extremely, extremely impressed. I mean a player really has to have a high level of versatility, concentration, and athleticism to pull off what Eddie Griffin managed to do there. This is mindblowing. I mean...wow. What a talented, gifted athlete. 

Seriously man, how do you pull all that $hit off at once?


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## Hibachi! (Sep 18, 2003)

KingOfTheHeatians said:


> [Ron Burgundy voice]What? You were watching porn, masturbating AND driving all while you were drunk? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing.[/Ron Burgundy voice]


:rofl:


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## pmac34 (Feb 10, 2006)

KingOfTheHeatians said:


> [Ron Burgundy voice]What? You were watching porn, masturbating AND driving all while you were drunk? How'd you do that? Heck, I'm not even mad; that's amazing.[/Ron Burgundy voice]


repped :rofl:


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## JPSeraph (Dec 17, 2005)

Classic Eddie Griffin.

No, Classic Minnesota Timberwolves.


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## Rule_By_His_Own_Hand (Jun 20, 2006)

Eddie's 10 things to do before he dies list:

1. Threaten to kill one of his coaches ---> CHECK

2. Punch one of his teammates in the face ---> CHECK

3. Attack some people in his dorm ---> CHECK

4. Get busted for drugs and alcohol ---> CHECK

5. Get busted for probation violations ---> CHECK

6. Get busted for drunk driving ---> CHECK

7. Try to kill his girlfriend ---> CHECK

8. Be committed to the wacko ward ---> CHECK

9. Crash his SUV while driving drunk, watching "Sphincter Reamers 69", and jacking off ---> CHECK


Eddie, what on earth do you have planned for the last thing on your list? Is it even possible to top #9?


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## Gilgamesh (Dec 23, 2005)

Pioneer10 said:


> Didn't Houston give up Richard Jefferson for this smuck.


I think so. 

Man has the guy fallen. #1 HS player in the nation, #1 freshmen in the country, and according to quite a few people #1 draft prospect in 2001.

So much promise and potential leading to almost nothing.


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